War at home – separation stories. #1

I am a writer at heart. From the age of 6 I started writing daily, either in the form of personal journals or of short stories or small essays on the cruel world. And it pains me to admit that good, truly engaging writing will basically come from a troubled heart — at least from me.

So here´s to the broken hearts – I´ll tell you some sad love stories I know. What is more human than to be a woman that feels like shit after a breakup?

#1 He left me for another woman.

#2 She left me for another woman.

#3 He left me – and I don´t know why.


She had already been tired of him for quite a while – he was a lazy, self-centered, short man, one with a beautiful smile and kind eyes, though. They were once young, in love, and experimental: as their relationship started, they decided it would be an open one. Our love cannot be a victim of our young age, and it is only but natural that in the course of our lives we feel desire for other people — it would not be fair to deny ourselves new experiences, nor reasonable that we should go separate ways in order to have them. This freedom was to them the ultimate display of commitment to each other.

A few years later, the relationship got boring to both of them. She fell in love with another man. He was married. Neither cared. She told her boyfriend she was having sex with a co-worker — he enjoyed it and asked for details, a fetich that somewhat reignited the spark on their relation. She had now someone else to cling to when he was not interested in her company, and more: she was living romance again. Her lover was more conventional — his wife did not know about his escapades. Until one day she did learn about it – and both their lives turned into a living hell.

They did not separate — nobody did, nor the girlfriend from her boyfriend, nor the lovers, nor the married couple. They carried on their messy story for years, the husband persecuted by his wife as he invented excuses for not answering the phone; the girlfriend and lover unhappy with both the man in her life, as she was not the center of attentions of  neither of them; the boyfriend, who knew what he felt? He would ask for more details about his girlfriend´s adventures with the married man while they enjoyed sex with each other less and less, until the fetich and the sex disappeared altogether as he kept drifting away to somewhere between his passions and his friends, neither of which the couple truly shared.

One day, he received an invitation to work partime at a different city. As his travels extended for weeks without previous notice, she was torn between having more time with her lover and understanding her relationship with the short fella was really fading into the end. Her heart sank as she realized she would do anything to be again the young woman fresh from college who shared an immense feeling with that bright, but rather scrappy boy with nails dirty from paint and plain lack of care, an old friend she never thought would become one of the greatest loves of her life until he did; yes, anything, except ending her relationship with her lover, without whom she could no longer live. She spent two weeks crying as her boyfriend started not to return her calls anymore and would not come back home without even telling her so with his own voice — short messages on the phone that would come late at night with lame excuses for the absence were the only source of news from him at that point.

It was time. She said they needed to talk. They finally met at an almost formal dinner — he broke up with her. She tried to maintain her composure, and failed miserably. She cried for hours as she wouldn´t let him leave without giving up on that crazy idea of ending their relationship. It got really late in the evening. She gave in. They took a taxi home, and she left him around the corner of his house. They both cried a lot as they said goodbye to each other and hugged for a last time.

From that day on, he almost never answered her calls, text messages, or emails. When he did, it was less than a phrase. She didn´t understand. Why wouldn´t he even talk to her anymore? That level of rejection was even more painful than the breakup. She tried to figure out what was happening, why he would cut her away so dramatically. At some point, she did discover he had been living for weeks in the other city where he worked with another woman with whom he was in love. She sent him an email telling him what she had discovered — he called her back and apologized, but there was nothing left to be done or said. She let go of trying to keep in touch with him — but she suffered like hell.

Her lover was there for her through all this time. He felt like shit, but he was afraid to lose her to madness. At that point his wife was tired of controlling him and he had more time to spend with the heartbroken girl he loved. Did she ever love him? At that point, it didn´t matter. He couldn´t leave her like that. He would put her to bed every night and pick her up at her home bright and early in the morning as they went to and from work together. She felt so much better every time he was by her side, and so much worse on the weekends, when she couldn´t even call him because he would be with his family. He missed her too, but he was afraid of changing so much of his life for a woman that still cried on his shoulder for another man.

Until she didn´t anymore. Fortunately, after a few months our girl got back on her feet again. She realized her life had improved so much as she was not constantly waiting for someone to arrive home late and annoyed anymore. Her lover made her feel like a precious jewel; he took care of her. She loved the feeling — it was so much more pleasing to take care of him in return, than to simply feel she was his mother making dinner and complaining it got cold. They shared so many interests in common, they had immense fun in each other´s company and they talked as if there was no tomorrow. He was his soul mate. And she didn´t want him to be her lover anymore. She was tired of that crazy messy love life she has had, and ached for something happy and uneventful. She didn´t want to suffer for love anymore.

His separation was as a long, complicated process. After months, he finally left his home. His wife kept on trying — dispassionately, but consistently — to have him back, but their relationship remained respectfully distant, or as much as it can be when two persons are parents to the same lovely 7-year old girl. One year went by until she discovered he was still seeing that same woman with whom he had cheated on her so many years ago. He wouldn´t tell her, something his now girlfriend found rather maddening. She finally filed for divorce, which was also another thing he was afraid to do. Who knows what was in his heart; the truth is, the former couple still remained amicable towards each other in spite of the potential for dramaticity of the latest events.

Our three intertwined couples finally became two very separate ones and a divorced woman healing her wounds. Two women were left for another women and one of them was at the two ends of this tale. We hope for the other to have also a happy ending.


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